“no see people WANT to be here, they just can’t be. you wouldn’t believe how many. no former president on trial has ever had so many imaginary protestors. most in history.”

some of the migrants DeSantis and his toadies sent to Martha’s Vineyard are now able to work and protected from deportation because they're 'considered victims of a potential crime' and if you need me I'll just be lol'ing forever orlandosentinel.com/2024/04/22/mig…

oh my god ahaha OH MY GOD

The lesson we should hope that people learn from Speaker Mike Johnson’s journey here is that, at the end of the day, in politics as in life, the right thing to do is … the right thing to do.

Here’s a tip:

As lawyers, we don’t take out lines of credit to pay ourselves our own “legal fees”, and then have a client reimburse us for our own “legal fees” as the client at the same time criminally falsifies business records to hide that they were not, in fact, “legal fees.”

The same people getting triggered about the flying of the Ukrainian flag in the Capitol have called these people 'patriots.'

Donald Trump is like if an unmade bed were a person but ok Gollum

the Ukraine deal matters not just because it’ll deliver what’s desperately needed — but because it tells Putin that the steamroll ride is fucking over

a couple days ago a group of jocks picked up & tossed my cyber truck into the woods behind the parking lot & im still pissed off to this day

cyber truck has 'beg for mercy' feature enabled but that did not stop varsity star quarterback from wiping 'JIZZ' on my $30k optional bumper

cybertruck septic tank fell off, got stuck in wheel, caused me to flip & scatter turds/willy wonka funko pops allover the highway killing me

open the schools

karma is my boyfriend

absolute queen shit right here 👑

Sleepy Joe, meet Sleepy Jackass

the Trump side is still screeching there’s no way he can get a fair jury in “deep blue” NYC, like sir next time pick a more right-wing place to do your criming

when there's an essay question on the test you didn't study for