Why’d it have to look at me like that

Someday you may be able to buy a Tesla with Bitcoin or Dogecoin, but they will never accept Ethereum because it requires gas

good night to everyone except for the people its not night for

Which you choosing?

Cakes these days are getting way too realistic

Sometimes vapists make me so mad because I’ll be walking down the street thinking I’m coming up on some freshly made donuts or warm apple pie but it’s actually just Chad smoking his vape

Heats the whole house very quickly.

Once.

I thought it was weird when my Uber driver had to stop at the gas station to get food

Then he got back in the car and did this and now I’m concerned for my safety

That’s pretty cheap tbh

There’s nothing worse than getting to the bathroom and realizing I forgot my phone so now I don’t know what to do while I’m in here

good morning to everyone except for the people its not morning for

good night to everyone except for the people its not night for

Question for the guys only (girls keep scrolling): if you could pick one person to pee next to here who would it be?

If my neighbor doesn’t mow his side within 24 hours I’m calling the city to turn him in