Ray Kump(@RayKump) 's Twitter Profileg
Ray Kump

@RayKump

Comedian, Host of Kump podcast, https://t.co/c16LCneDR2 https://t.co/v0U14KvODn

ID:483932572

linkhttps://www.patreon.com/RayKump calendar_today05-02-2012 15:06:09

4,7K Tweets

51,7K Followers

358 Following

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Conan O’Brien: “Hey, look at this bear jerk his dick. Hey! Pay attention, I learned this at Harvard!”

Intern: “Mr. O’Brien, a plane just hit the World Trade Center!”

Conan O’Brien: “Good.”

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Cohen’s gonna spiral, and self-finance a “Borat in Gaza” film. Biden will have him whacked by Mossad. His ex-wife will play him in the biopic. Rick Moranis will be publicly executed for unrelated tax fraud. All very predictable.

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These Ball players who ask for their “milestone” balls back are only one step above pedophiles. Memorabilia isn’t for you, it’s for crippled kids and gravediggers. You’re supposed to be in on the scam, not scrapbooking like a fat bitch. This is why DiMaggio shot himself.

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The fact that LeBron forced his own son to swap hearts with him in a black market surgery in Oslo, 2 days before Bronny suffered a cardiac arrest, does NOT mean that LeBron has that dog in him. Stephen Jackson would still dominate him 1v1, and then call him a bitch. No Cap.

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Suiciding off the top of the Shinjuku Mitsui Building after the used panty corporation fired me for littering, but at least my son already killed himself last week. I hope the cucks who nuked us don’t think I’m messy.

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Ridley Scott is beginning production on his Henry Kissinger biopic, starring Joaquin Phoenix as Kissinger, who will spend the entire film spinning around in a circle making fart noises. Best living actor.

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Later Hank, you were a real one. Here’s a painting I did a few years back, everybody thought he was RGB.

Later Hank, you were a real one. Here’s a painting I did a few years back, everybody thought he was RGB.
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